"I didn't pick up enough wickets, and neither did I create enough pressure from one end. I was thinking, 'Turning wicket hai, turning wicket hai, you should get more wickets'." In hindsight, as he told ESPNcricinfo, off-spinner Jayant Yadav realises, he shouldn't have let the turning track in Pune for that Test against Australia get to his head, as he failed to put the ball consistently on a length on a pitch where Australian spinners ruled the roost.
And even though his much-vaunted spin mates Ravichandran Ashwin and Ravindra Jadeja also didn't exploit the surface, Jayant was the one who was dropped from the side after India's rare home defeat. He, in fact, hasn't played for the country since those two poor innings of bowling in February 2017 despite enjoying a fine start to his career a few months earlier against England.
"That was the first time in international cricket I was put under a lot of pressure by not doing well, and I think I just let that get to me. In hindsight, if I could change one thing, it would be to not think about wickets, just think about bowling good balls, creating pressure and a bowling partnership," Jayant further said.
"Because on any wicket, seamer or turner, you need to put pressure to get good batsmen out. I think I just let the pressure go from one end."
Wrist-spinner Kuldeep Yadav's dream debut three games later in Dharamshala coincided with Jayant going out of favour for the third spinner's role. But an untimely injury, a stress fracture of the finger, also didn't help his cause, as it took a while to diagnose, treat and rehabilitate completely.
The 30-year-old felt aggrieved about it at the time but has now adopted a philosophical approach towards life.
"I've had incredible highs and incredible lows in the past two-three seasons," he said. "But that's just part and parcel of life, you know? It just depends on how you take it. You can't do much about injuries. I've maintained this always - it's not about getting to one point or getting somewhere. It's all about enjoying that particular moment."
A very honest individual when it comes to his game, Jayant refuses to blame that injury for his downfall in the pecking order.
"I think I had decent opportunities (after comeback). I played Ranji Trophy, I played a good one, one and a half years in the A team regularly. I have had opportunities after that. I went to England, I played Sri Lanka [both for India A]"
"See, I feel you can get disturbed by each and everything, and you can get disturbed by nothing at all. Take this (COVID-19) lockdown, for example. This is unprecedented. That's just Mother Nature telling us to live in the present and not think too much about the future. I think this is a very good wake-up call for everyone, because you never know what is going to happen," he said.
"You can't always think about getting into a particular team. Only 15 people are selected. It's a very competitive sport."
"To make a comeback in the Indian Test team you have to be relentless and keep knocking on the door. I think one good Ranji season will get me back in the reckoning. Everybody has seen what I can do, the pros and cons. I've been there," Jayant added.
"It's about having that good season, getting into the India A set-up again, starting from scratch. If you do well in Ranji Trophy and then do well in India A, then only you get into the Test team. It's a very good filter."
(Inputs from ESPNcricinfo)
